Abortion When it Involves a Rape: See the Faces
by Jim Hewes
Addressing abortion following criminal rape is sensitive and complex. Below I draw from nearly two decades of direct experience as the director of Project Rachel, where I have accompanied many women wounded and hurt by abortion.
I also rely on people directly affected such as Rebecca Kiessling, Lianna Rebolledo, Stephanie Reynolds, Jennifer Christie, Kathy Barnette, Ashley Sigrest, Kay Zibolsky, Julie Makimaa, Aimee Murphy, Jennifer Christie, Rebekah Berg, Paula Peyton-IIari, Serena Dyksen, Ayala Isenberg, Teresa delMilagro, Ryan Bamberger, and Steventhen Holland, to shed light on this very difficult and emotionally charged issue.
Understanding the Trauma of Rape
A forcible rape is a horrible violent act, but how society responds to this hideous crime is critical. Many women report that abortion only deepens their trauma, making healing far more difficult. Alternatively, in choosing life, they benefit from recognizing the power they possess to break the cycle of violence and reclaim their lives.
There are many stories in the book “Victims and Victors,” as well as in the DVD “Except in Cases of Rape? 12 Stories of Survival.” I urge you to get these resources so that you can hear for yourself firsthand from a group of women whose voices are not often heard in this debate.
Survivor Stories: Transforming Pain into Purpose
Ryan Bomberger’s biological mother was raped, and he was conceived. Instead of having an abortion, she placed Ryan for adoption. Ryan started the Radiance Foundation and has become a passionate advocate for adoption, knowing that the birth mother may keep in touch with the family that adopts her baby, if there is a mutual agreement.
Kay Zibolsky was raped and became pregnant at the age of 16. She placed her daughter Robin for adoption. She said that her baby became part of her healing. Kay’s response to this difficult part of her life was to start the Life after Assault League, which helps women in similar situations that Kay had faced. Her memoir is The Sorrow of Sexual Assault and the Joy of Healing.
Julie Makimaa was conceived in rape. Her response was to start Fortress International, which has helped with the concerns and needs of women, children and families affected by sexual assault.
Aimee Murphy was raped at the age of 16, and her rapist threatened her with violence if she didn’t get an abortion. Aimee didn’t want to aid the rapist by doing more violence to her pre-born child if she was pregnant. She eventually started Rehumanize International (a member group of the Consistent Life Network) to help educate people to respect all life.
Steventhen Holland’s mother was in a mental institution. They were pressuring her to have an abortion, but she placed him for adoption; he is a part of “Broken, Not Dead” ministries, which helps people in similar situations.
Twenty-year-old Ayala Isenberg was raped more times than she could count during four years of abuse beginning when she was just a little girl, eventually at age 15 conceiving through rape. When she conceived her daughter Rachel, she chose not to get an abortion when she realized that there were people who wanted to really help her. Her daughter was the one person in the world whom she really loved. She knew that children like hers don’t deserve to be erased and that they do really matter.
Lianna Rebolledo was raped at age 12. She saw her daughter not as a reminder of the violent act of rape or some type of punishment, but someone precious who resulted from a horrible, tragic experience. But good can come from evil. Her child was a reminder that love is always stronger than hate. It isn’t how one begins life, but who one will become that matters. Our ultimate value isn’t based on the act that brought any of us here, but the intrinsic dignity of every life. Lianna and other such women refused to let the rape define who they were or who their child was but relied on something much deeper. This is reflected as she speaks out trying to help victims of abuse.
Challenging Common Assumptions
These women and men, as well as others, put a name, a face, a voice, and a story on what too often is just an abstract concept or a theoretical argument. These victors who don’t abort remind us that life is always a gift, never a punishment. In addition, these mothers refuse to allow these horrible traumas to define their identities.
Moreover, there is a flawed underlying assumption in the media discussions:– that all women who have conceived by rape want an abortion. Studies, including those reported by Shauna Prewitt in in her Georgetown Law Journal article, found that at least half, and in many studies the majority, of women with a pregnancy resulting from rape choose not to abort the baby. Many survivors realized that they had the opportunity (because of their great courage and compassion) to show that they are far greater than the rapist. These women knew they could break the chain of destruction and the cycle of violence.
An assault by the rapist is compounded by an assault by the abortionist committing violence within the rape victim. Abortion is a decision and act that can never be reversed but could add more guilt and additional traumas to an already burdened woman (if not immediately, maybe years later).
A rape is a conscious intentional violent act done to a woman. Someone larger and more powerful than her “took over” her body in her vulnerable state. She is the innocent victim of a sexual assault. Why would she, who is bigger and stronger, in turn make a conscious decision to perpetuate this type of violence by intentionally victimizing her child, who is also an innocent like her? Why would she lower herself to the level of the rapist by aborting a defenseless baby who had done nothing wrong? A woman who chooses to bring her child into the world after she’s been raped is refusing to let the rapist turn her into him.
Choosing a Different Path
Abortion after rape won’t “unrape” the victim, and the womb will be forcefully opened again by the abortion. She may feel “forced” at some level to have an abortion. She may because of this become a victim for the second time. Also, she may compound her pain because she will not only have to heal from the rape but also from the abortion.
The abortion could even hide or cover up the crime committed against her.
Rapists should not be executed but should be sentenced to the full extent of the law, including strengthening laws that don’t accomplish this justice.
Yet should we continue to allow the death penalty of innocent pre-born babies where we don’t use the death penalty for the terrible crime of their fathers? In fact, one of the reasons for opposition to the death penalty for those on death row is the possibility of executing someone who is innocent. Aborting the child after the mother is raped gives the child fewer rights than the rapist.
In states where abortion is illegal except for rape, the message of the “rape exception” might give a green light to potential rapists, including those predators of sexual abuse. In these instances, legal abortion may mask the true problems of a criminal rape. Males having a sense of entitlement to female bodies may cause more criminal rapes to occur.
The alternative is more thorough criminal investigations, as well as more rape prevention measures, aimed at addressing the underlying problem of a rape culture.
Love Triumphs Over Hate
Unfortunately, many sectors of society only offer women who have conceived in rape a “quick fix,” a band-aid solution of abortion. Women know that what is bad for their child will be bad for them, and what is good for their child will be good for them. Ultimately, women deserve better than a violent solution of abortion, and so do their pre-born children. They deserve comprehensive support and genuine compassion. True healing occurs when they receive true compassion, an abundance of resources, and encouragement to choose life, knowing others will be right there for them in long run.
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For more of our posts on abortion and rape, see:
Two Women Pregnant from Rape, Two Outcomes
Abortion Facilitates Sex Abuse: Documentation
How Abortion is Useful for Rape Culture
A Pro-Life Feminist Critique of the “Rape and Incest Exception”
The Message of “Never Rarely Sometimes Always”: Abortion Gets Sexual Predators Off the Hook
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